“How does that look?”
Jenna
stared at the woman in the mirror, and the woman in the mirror stared back,
unsmiling. One thing was for sure, it
didn’t look like her. The woman in the
mirror might actually be quite attractive, if only she’d lighten up a bit. The back of her neck felt naked and the
sculpted shape of her newly shorn hair seemed alien and unfamiliar. She was used to it hanging around her
shoulders, and having to brush it out of her face on windy days.
“It
is quite a change,” said the hairdresser.
She was a plump woman whose own hair, coloured, highlighted and twisted
into an elaborate knot, was obviously intended as an advertisement for her
skills. “It might take some getting used
to.” She angled the mirror so that Jenna
could see the neat layers at the back of her head. “But I do think it really suits you.”
“I’ve
always had longish hair up till now,” Jenna said. “It doesn’t look like me. But I think it’s very nice,” she added
hastily.
“Slim
women like you can get away with short hair,” said the hairdresser, whose name
was Sharon. “You don’t need to balance your
body. If you’re bigger – bigger than me
– very short hair looks silly. That’s
what I always think, anyway.”
Jenna,
who’d never thought of herself as slim, nodded sagely. She got out of the chair, and Sharon removed
the coverall and brushed stray hairs away.
Trying not to keep glancing surreptitiously at her new self in all the
mirrors in the salon, Jenna collected her jacket, handed over a very reasonable
amount of money – far less than she’d have paid in St. Albans for a restyle –
and stepped into Woodbridge High Street, wondering what Rick would think of
it. In the days when he still commented
on her appearance, he’d always said he liked her hair long.
If he notices, of course, a little wormy
voice said.
Of course he’ll bloody notice, Jenna
retorted. He’d better bloody notice. It was a breezy morning, and her head was
cold. She walked briskly down to the
bookshop, which had a nice little cafe at the back, and went inside, feeling in
need of a restorative cup of coffee.
She
had barely sat down when her phone sounded.
A few weeks ago Joe, in a spirit of mischief, had changed the ring tone,
and the cheery call of a cuckoo clock resounded through the shop, making all
the customers look up. She checked the
screen. Her mother. With the guilty realisation that she hadn’t
told Patricia where she was, she pressed ‘accept’.
“Oh,
thank goodness for that. I’ve been
trying to reach you at home and there’s no reply, all I get is that wretched
answering machine. Where are you?”
“I’m
in Suffolk, Mum. At the cottage. I thought I’d spend a couple of days here on
my way back from Norwich.”
“Well,
I do think you might have told me. I was
imagining all sorts of things when you weren’t answering at ten o’clock last
night.”
“I
could have been out with Saskia,” Jenna pointed out.
“No,
I knew you weren’t, because I rang her after that. I have to say I didn’t really like her tone.”
“If
you phoned her at ten o’clock, I’m not surprised.”
“I
was worried,” said Patricia plaintively.
“You hear such dreadful things ...”
“Then
stop reading the Daily Mail. Mum, I
can’t keep you informed about every little thing I do, I’m forty-seven, not
seven.”
There
was a hurt pause. Jenna glanced up, saw
an elderly woman at the corner table look hastily away, and realised that her
one-sided conversation was in danger of becoming the morning’s
entertainment. She said, moderating her
voice, “Anyway, I can’t talk here, I’m in a cafe. I’ll phone you when I get back to the
cottage, OK?”
“When’s
that likely to be? I’m meeting Susan for
lunch.”
Jenna
looked at her watch. Half past
eleven. “Not until later this afternoon,
probably. Look, to be on the safe side I’ll
call you this evening. About seven OK?” Too late, she remembered that she was having
supper at the Marsdens’, and hoped she wouldn’t forget to ring. If she did, Patricia would never let her hear
the end of it.
“I
suppose it will have to do,” said Patricia.
“Please don’t forget, Jennifer. I
want to hear all about Rosie and the boys.”
“You
will,” Jenna assured her. “I’ll speak
to you later, sevenish. Bye, Mum.” She pressed the off button quickly, before
Patricia could offer any objection, but she had barely put the phone down on
the table when it rang again. Oh, for God’s
sake! Jenna thought in exasperation, snatching it up and answering, no more
than half way through the first cuckoo.
“Hello?”
“Hello,
is that Jenna?”
It
wasn’t her mother. It was a man, and his
accent told her who he was an instant before he offered his name. “It’s Fran.
Fran McNeil.”
“Fran! Hello, great to hear from you! Look, sorry if I sounded a bit abrupt, but I
thought it was my mother.”
“I
wasn’t your mother, the last time I looked.”
His voice was warm and amused.
“Anyway, how are you?”
“I’m
fine – and you?”
“Oh,
just fine. So – what were you doing at
UEA?”
“Dropping
my daughter off. It’s her first term,
she’s doing English and Creative Writing.
While I was there, I happened to bump into Jon, and he told me you were
still around, so I thought it’d be nice to meet up.”
“I’ll
go with that. And you’re in Orford? I’m not that far away – I live in Aldeburgh.”
“That’s
a long way from Inverness,” said Jenna.
“Aye,
it is that. But more convenient.”
The
conversation was in serious danger of becoming hopelessly bogged down in banality. Taking the plunge, Jenna said, “How about Snape
Maltings? There’s a nice cafe there, and
we can sit outside if it’s sunny.”
“I’ll
go with that. Is tomorrow afternoon
OK? Around three?”
Slightly
bemused by the speed of it, Jenna agreed.
When the call ended, she sat for
a while, sipping her coffee, thinking about her time at university. It had formed her adult self so emphatically,
establishing her as the quiet, sensible geek girl, that it was sometimes hard
to remember that she’d had a life since, as a wife and mother. All the paths taken, or not taken, that had
contributed to the person she was now, seemed to be tangled up in her
mind. And did she necessarily like where
she’d ended up? She felt suddenly that
she’d never done much with her life or her qualifications. She didn’t have music on YouTube, or a
professorship, or a thriving business.
She just had a husband and three children, and none of them seemed to
need or want her any more.
There you go again, said the wormy
voice. Self pity is a horrible trait, and you’re in serious danger of
indulging in it. You’re young(ish),
you’re intelligent, healthy, and you’re not poor. Get off your pampered backside and do
something useful, before you get stuck in a rut so deep you’ll never climb out
of it.
That
voice had more than a little resemblance to Saskia’s. Reminded, Jenna angled her phone, took a
quick selfie of her new haircut, and emailed it to her friend for approval, or
not. Then she finished her coffee, and
bought a new guide to local walks. She
could do with losing some of the flab that had accumulated over the past few
years, without her ever really noticing, and she wanted to see a little more of
the beautiful countryside around her.
But not necessarily, she thought with a grin, in the exhausting company
of Sammy the spaniel.
She
spent the rest of the morning browsing the small shops in Woodbridge, bought a
few clothes, and a set of jars for the cottage kitchen, and had a look round
the quayside. On impulse, she went into
the Tide Mill, which had been restored some years ago and was now a
museum. It was the sort of place she
would have visited with the twins when they were younger, and fascinated by
machinery of any sort. She found it
surprisingly interesting, and thought with a pang that Tom, in particular,
would have loved it, and known all the right questions to ask the guide. A school party was going round, groups of
chattering ten-year-olds with bright green jumpers and clipboards, accompanied
by half a dozen rather harassed looking adults, and she felt not the slightest
desire to jump again into the teaching maelstrom. Whatever she did in the future, it wouldn’t
include a return to her old profession, in any guise. Been there,
done that, and never want to do it again, Jenna thought, standing to one
side as a tide of small boys rushed past her in their eagerness to see the
wheels turn. But I’ll have to think of some job I can do – my own self-respect
demands it, if nothing else. Once I’ve
finished the research into the casket.
What with the
visit to the Tide Mill, followed by lunch and a leisurely shop at a small
supermarket, where she bought enough fresh food and milk to last her several
more days, it was late afternoon by the time Jenna returned to Wisteria
Cottage. This time, there was no parking
space outside, so she drove round the track beside the houses and left her car
at the back, just outside the garden gate.
Walking up the path to the kitchen door with her bags of shopping, she
realised suddenly that for the first time it
felt as if she was truly coming home.
Checking her
emails with a cup of tea and a biscuit beside her, she found one from
Saskia. “AT LAST! Knew you’d look amazing, you foxy bitch! Rick’ll love it! That clinches it, you’re modelling for
me. I’ve got just the clothes for you,
come round when you get back and you can try them on. Rosie OK?
India couldn’t wait to see the back of me. Love, S.”
Jenna wasn’t a
hundred per cent sure that Rick would love her new haircut, but at this precise
moment, she didn’t really care. She’d
become more accustomed to her naked nape during the course of the day, but she
still didn’t recognise the woman she kept glimpsing in shop windows. “So I’m a foxy bitch, am I, Sass?” she typed
in reply. “Grrr! Glad you like it. Rosie was fine, we had a fun weekend, and I’m
going to stay here for a few days, meeting an old uni friend tomorrow. See you soon, love, Jen. PS You’ve twisted my arm enough. OK, I’ll model for you. Is it this weekend? That’s a
promise. xxJ.”
She sent it,
and then saw that another email had arrived in her inbox. It was from Emma James. With some anticipation, she opened it.
Her work on
the casket was finished, Emma wrote.
She’d written it all up, and taken a lot of photos in close up of both
the exterior and all parts of the interior.
The report was ready and Jenna was free to come and collect it, and of
course the casket, whenever was convenient.
“And perhaps we can discuss it over lunch,” the email ended. “I know you said you don’t want to sell it,
but the grapevine has been working overtime in the world of antique textiles,
and I’ve had someone contact me who’s very interested in buying it, at a price
considerably more than the sum I mentioned.
So that’s something to think about before we meet. In the meantime, many thanks for entrusting
it to me – I’ve thoroughly enjoyed myself.
Give me a ring to arrange a date.
See you soon, all the best, Emma.”
Jenna looked
at the time on the computer. Five
forty-three, so Emma would probably soon be heading home on bus or tube. She could phone tomorrow morning, and perhaps
suggest a meeting either on Friday or early the following week. Despite her eagerness to see the finished
report, and to have the casket back in her possession, she was enjoying her
stay at the cottage too much to hurry back to St. Albans. There were places she’d promised herself
she’d visit, she had the meeting with Fran to look forward to, and she knew
that she needed to unwind from the tensions, the hassle and above all the grief
of the past few months. It was one of
the reasons they’d bought Wisteria Cottage, to have somewhere totally different
from home or work, where they could both relax and be at peace. It was a shame that Rick had only found the
time to come here twice this year.
Emma’s email
had reminded her of her intention to research the casket’s history while she
was in Suffolk. She couldn’t do much
this evening, because she was going round to the Marsdens for supper. And before that, she needed a bath, and a
period of time to psych herself up to phone Patricia. It seemed ridiculous that she should still
feel like a naughty child whenever she spoke to her mother, but she couldn’t
help it, and she had the uneasy feeling that most other people’s parents didn’t
have the same effect, especially when the child in question was a supposedly
mature forty-seven.
In fact,
Patricia was far more eager to hear about the twins in Australia than to
complain about anything that her daughter had, or had not been doing. Jenna promised to print out and send her some
of their photographs (Patricia had not yet joined the internet age), and then
gave her a brief resume of her trip to Norwich.
As she had suspected, her mother was not so interested in Rosie’s new
life, a fact which irritated Jenna, who loved her daughter dearly. It was easy to say briefly that she was going
out for a meal, and her quick ‘Sorry, mum, I’ve got to go, speak to you soon’
cut through Patricia’s insistent questions – “Who? Who are you going with? Where are you going?”
As always
after a phone call to her mother, Jenna felt drained, frustrated and
annoyed. She wished she could have had a
different relationship with Patricia, that she could have been less critical
and demanding, more friendly and supportive.
But it was no use wishing, she thought sadly, at seventy-five she was
unlikely to change, and ever since her father’s untimely death, Patricia had
lived her life through Jenna’s. It was a
major reason why Jenna had been so determined not to interfere in her own
daughter’s life, or indeed lay down the law with any of her children once they
became old enough to think for themselves and make their own decisions. In any case, it was counter-productive: the
more Patricia tried to meddle, the more determined Jenna became to keep her
distance. One day, in the not so distant
future, the time would come when advancing age and infirmity meant that her
mother would genuinely need her help and support, but Jenna had long ago
decided to banish the prospect from her mind, until it actually arrived.
Fortunately,
supper at the Marsdens’ was an excellent antidote to the feelings engendered by
the phone call, and Jenna enjoyed every moment, particularly the Spanish
chicken, fragrant with olives and chorizo, and accompanied by a very nice white
Rioja. Two generous glasses ensured that
she slept soundly, and woke with a feeling of pleasurable anticipation, mixed
with dread. This was the day that she
would meet Fran McNeil, for the first time since leaving university. Would they have anything to talk about? Would
there still be that easy sense of camaraderie she remembered, when they had sat
in the kitchen long into the small hours, putting the world to rights, she,
Jules and Sarah, Jason, Fran and Jon? She’d felt
it was there when she’d met Jon at UEA, and it was there, too, the rare times
she talked to Jules. Hopefully she
wouldn’t have to spend an hour making polite small talk to someone whom she
hadn’t seen for a quarter of a century, and with whom she no longer had
anything in common beyond the fact they’d shared a student house for two years.
Over a
leisurely breakfast of toast and marmalade, plus considerable quantities of
coffee, Jenna looked at some of his other songs on YouTube. They were mostly covers – beautiful, but
still covers – of well-known hits. A
couple she didn’t recognise, but that was nothing new – the twins regularly
teased her about her ignorance of recent music, especially the kind that didn’t
feature on commercial radio stations.
It seemed a shame that he didn’t play his own stuff – she had a vague
memory of him composing some rather pleasant music behind the firmly shut door
of his room – but she supposed that for someone who’d published poetry, song
lyrics were very small beer indeed. She decided not to look at the stand-up clips,
acknowledging to herself that she didn’t want them to be disappointing, and
turned instead to the genealogy site she’d subscribed to a few weeks ago, when
she first started the research on the casket.
A few clicks
and her password called up the female family tree she had begun to compile. Jenna Clarke, Patricia Talbot, May Goodwin,
Winifred Emily Merelina Durrant, and, at the top, the name of her great-great
grandmother, Emily Taylor. To find out the
name of her mother, she needed her birth certificate, and although she knew
that she’d been born around 1862, in Colchester, that information proved to be
insufficient – there were dozens of Emily Taylors, their births registered in
places she’d only vaguely heard of, like Tendring or Romford, some in various
parts of east London, but none in Colchester.
She looked at the list for a while, wondering why she’d thought it would
be easy or straightforward. The family
history expert she’d consulted at the library had pointed out that information
given on official documents wasn’t always accurate – people were frequently
vague about where they’d been born, a birthplace might not be where the birth
was actually registered, and there was a strong tendency to lie about exact
ages. The census information, consulted
next, was similarly awash with Emily Taylors of around the right age, and Jenna
looked at it rather helplessly. How
could she possibly tell which was the right one, when all she had to go on was
a place of birth that might not be right, and an age which was quite possibly
wrong as well? It cost around ten pounds
to get a copy of a birth certificate, which would give her the information she
needed to go back to the previous generation, and while she didn’t mind making
one or two mistakes, the thought of having to order dozens of them to find the
right Emily Taylor was daunting, and not a little ridiculous.
Well, she
wouldn’t find her three-greats grandmother by staring at a screen. Jenna resolved to consult the woman in the
library again, when she got back to St. Albans.
She knew she wasn’t in the right mood for concentrated research this
morning, she was too wound up about meeting Fran. There was something else she’d decided to do
while she was here, and she spent the next couple of hours going round the
house, noting down her ideas for redecorating it. She’d decided that a fresh look, pale blue
and primrose yellow, would suit Wisteria Cottage very well, and although it
would mean replacing some of the curtains she’d made, they had been cheap and
cheerful and it was worth getting it all exactly right. It seemed nothing short of criminal that they’d
spent so little time here, and the cottage, not to mention Orford, deserved
better. She imagined quiet weekends
away, winter walks and a glowing fire in the wood-burning stove in the living
room. Somewhere for Rick to relax – and God knows, Jenna thought, he’s in need of it.
She went out
into the garden and looked back at the kitchen.
It was housed in a small lean-to that had been added to the cottage
about ten years previously. The Marsdens
had a similar extension, but theirs was much bigger, came out further, and was
big enough for a table as well as kitchen units. Jenna loved the kitchen in their St. Albans
house, which was a large family room where everyone could eat together. It wouldn’t cost too much to enlarge the one
here, and getting planning permission should be straightforward. She’d run it past Rick when he returned.
By the time
she’d finished taking notes, and photographs on her phone, it was twelve
o’clock. She phoned Emma James, who
turned out to be busy, but managed to make an appointment with her assistant
for Thursday morning. Then, feeling in
need of some fresh air, she walked up to the market square to buy more milk and
some croissants at the bakery, and a sandwich for her lunch. She ate it sitting on a bench by the castle,
watching another group of schoolchildren, in red jumpers this time, assembling
at the entrance with their clipboards.
It was very pleasant in the sun, and almost possible to pretend it was
still summer, instead of the third week in September. She remembered the conversation over dinner
the previous evening, when Gary had asked her if they were stocked up with wood
for the stove, and had joked about the East coast winter just around the
corner. “Wait till you feel our lazy
wind!”
“Lazy?” Jenna
had queried.
Her host
adopted a competent version of the local accent. “Thass a lazy wind – that don’t goo round yew, that goo straight through you!”
They had
laughed, but Jenna remembered the bleakness of her winter in Maldon, long ago,
the bitter gales, and May’s cheerful voice.
“You’d better get used to it, girl, there ain’t nothing between you and
Russia!”
Something
else, then, to do while she was here.
She took out her phone and made a note: ‘wood – where? how much, price, where
to put, shed?” Then she strolled back
towards Wisteria Cottage, enjoying the warmth and the sense of peace and
relaxation which seemed impossible to obtain in St. Albans. There was still an hour or so before she
must leave for Snape, so she filled that time with some long overdue weeding of
the herbaceous borders edging the garden.
It took her mind off the coming meeting with Fran, and proved highly
therapeutic. Washed and changed into
cream chinos and a flowery top, she set off for Snape with a mixture of
anticipation and apprehension.
Snape
Maltings, with its craft shops, galleries and concert hall, was a favourite
destination for residents and tourists alike, and Jenna had visited it many
times. Despite the lateness of the
season, there were few spaces in the car park, but she squeezed the Peugeot
into a narrow gap at the back, between a yellow Mini and a very large and
immaculate 4x4 that looked as if it had never been off-road in its short
life. As usual, she’d arrived early, so
she nipped into the food hall. She
wanted to buy presents for Saskia and her other friends in St. Albans, and jars
of locally produced honey, chutneys and jams were always popular. It took her longer than she’d intended to
choose them, and when she emerged with two heavy, clinking bags, and glanced
at her watch, it was ten past three.
Silently cursing, she hurried round to the tea room. There was a queue at the counter, and the
tables were full. She hastily looked round,
searching for a lone man in his forties, perhaps dressed in black ...
And there he
was, sitting at a table under one of the windows, talking to a child. It was so unexpected that she wondered for a
moment if her eyes had deceived her. But
no, it was unquestionably Fran, because he saw her looking and smiled suddenly
in recognition. As she began to make her
way over, he got to his feet and held out his arms. “Jen! It’s
good to see you!”
“And you,” she
said, and meant it. All the awkwardness
she had feared had vanished like snow in sunshine. They hugged, and then he looked her up and
down. “I’d be lying if I said you hadn’t
changed a bit,” he said, with a grin.
“But you wear it well.”
“That’s what
Jon said. You don’t look so bad
yourself.”
It was
true. Maturity suited Fran, had removed
the gauche awkwardness from his movements and given his face character. He was still lean, but no longer had that
gangly, unfinished look she remembered. In
a white shirt and black jeans, he looked fresh, assured, at ease with himself
and the world, just as he had in the YouTube clip. Unlike many middle-aged men who wore hats,
however, his hair although greying was still plentiful, and rather longer than
Jenna’s new crop.
“Come and sit
down,” he said. “I’ve got a big pot of
tea and some cake. And there’s someone
I’d like you to meet.”
The child had
stood up. With her high forehead, her
black hair scraped into long plaits, and her pale intent stare, Jenna would not
have been surprised to hear her introduced as Wednesday Addams. Instead, Fran said, “My daughter, Flora. Flora, this is Jenna, one of my oldest
friends.”
“You don’t look very old,” said the child,
frowning. “Are you the same age as Dad?” To Jenna’s surprise, her voice had a distinct
American twang, which increased the resemblance to Wednesday Addams.
“’Fraid so,”
Jenna told her cheerfully. She sat down
at the end of the table, so that she had Flora on her left and Fran on her
right. “And how old are you?”
“Ten,” said
the girl. She had a very large pink
milkshake in front of her, with a candy-striped straw in it, and she sucked at
it with gusto, studying Jenna all the while.
“And a half.”
“Going on
eighteen,” said Fran, with affection.
Unlike his daughter, his own accent was still liltingly Scottish,
although he’d left the Highlands nearly thirty years ago and never, as far as
Jenna knew, gone back. She seemed to
remember that he hadn’t got on with his family.
“My daughter
Rosie is eighteen,” she said. “A bit
older than you, Flora, but you’ll soon catch up.” She accepted the steaming cup which Fran
passed her, and chose a piece of caramel shortbread from the plate of
cakes. “Thank you. Jon said you were living on the Suffolk
borders, but I didn’t realise he meant Aldeburgh.”
“He
didn’t. I’ve only been here a couple of
weeks – I used to live near Beccles.
This is further to commute to the university, but then I only go in once
a week, to take a tutorial.”
“That’s where
Rosie is, at UEA – you may come across
her, she’s just started on English and Creative Writing. Rosie Johnson.”
“I’ll remember
her, but I don’t promise favourable marks,” said Fran. “Not unless I’m paid a great deal of
money.” He grinned. “Couple of million, perhaps.”
“Cheap at the
price. So ... why Aldeburgh?”
“I could say,
why Orford? Are you living there, or on
holiday?”
“Both, sort
of. It’s our second home – my husband Rick
and I actually live in St. Albans. You
remember Jules? He’s her older brother.”
“How could I
forget Jules? Miss ‘If It Doesn’t Move
I’ll Spray Bleach On It’ 1988. I think she was the only reason we didn’t all
get dysentery. So you married her
brother?”
He hadn’t come
to the wedding – in fact, of her five housemates, only Jules had attended. Jenna nodded.
“Yes. We’ve got twin boys, as
well as Rosie. They’re in Australia,
back packing, and Rick’s on a business trip in the States. So my nest is finally empty.”
“I thought
mine was,” said Fran. “And then my chick
came back.” He smiled at Flora. “And very welcome she is, too, despite her
arrival being somewhat unexpected.”
“Mom’s in
California,” Flora said with pride.
“She’s got a big part on a new
TV show.”
“Has she? What’s her name?”
“Krystal Waters.” Flora’s pale blue stare prevented any
tactless amusement. “And she’s famous.”
“I think I’ve
heard of her,” said Jenna, although in fact the name was completely unfamiliar,
as well as being faintly ridiculous.
“What was she in?”
“She was in Game of Thrones, the third season, but she got killed after four episodes. And Breaking
Bad also. And now she’s going to be a
detective in a new cop show, and she’s going to be so busy she knew she
wouldn’t have time to look after me properly while it was filming, so she sent
me to stay with Dad. And I flew all the
way from LA to London by myself.”
“Wow,” said
Jenna, genuinely impressed. “That was
brave of you.”
“I’m used to
it,” said Flora nonchalantly. “I’ve done
it gazillions of times before.”
Fran silently
mouthed ‘twice’, and Jenna found herself struggling to keep her face
straight. She said, “Are you going to go
to school while you’re here?” It had not
escaped her notice that the autumn term in most English schools had commenced a
couple of weeks ago.
“Don’t worry,
she starts at one of the Aldeburgh primaries next week,” said Fran. “I have no intention of letting her run wild
for six months.”
“Good. Once a teacher, always a teacher,
unfortunately.”
“So you’re not
still at the chalkface?”
“No, I gave up
when I had the kids, and decided I didn’t want to go back. Though I did private tutoring for several
years. There’s a big demand for it in
St. Albans.”
“I can
imagine. Well, if I want Flora’s maths
licked into shape, I’ll know who to ask.”
“I’m sure she
won’t need it. Are you an A student,
Flora?”
“Yes,” said
the girl, with a look that said, ‘Of course, I wouldn’t be anything else.’ “And I’m good at math. Miss Stein said I was the best in the class.”
Jenna wasn’t
sure if she warmed to this extremely self-assured and rather intimidating
little girl. She said, “How long have
you lived in California, Flora? You
sound very American.”
“That’s ‘cos I
am. Since I was two and Mom and Dad
split up. But I come to England for
holidays. And when Mom was filming Game of Thrones in Ireland, I stayed
with Dad. I was eight then.” She
finished the milkshake with a resounding and prolonged slurping noise that
rather spoilt her adult air, and added, “Dad, can I go look for a card and a
gift for Mom? It’s her birthday soon.”
“OK, the card
shop’s just through there, but don’t go anywhere else.”
“I won’t,”
said Flora. She pushed the chair back
and hurried out of the cafe, brandishing a beaded purse.
“Gosh, she’s
very grown up,” Jenna said, into the vacuum left by her departure.
“The word
you’re too polite to say is ‘precocious’.”
Fran leaned back in his chair, smiling.
“She’s been Mommie’s little princess for far too long. Six months at an English school will do her
the world of good, rub a few corners off.
And she’s not channelling Wednesday Addams, by the way, despite the
unnerving resemblance. The intended
effect was Anne of Green Gables. I caught her trying to buy red hair dye in
Boots on Saturday.”
Jenna choked
on her tea. “That’s something that never
occurred to Rosie, thank goodness. Her
childhood heroine was Hermione Granger.”
“Good for
her. She must be bright and hard-working
if she’s got onto the Eng Lit course – there’s a huge demand for places.”
“Without
trying to sound too boastful – well, all right, sounding boastful – yes, she
is.” Jenna decided not to mention the
poetry prize, which really would sound boastful. Anyway, if Rosie was going to attend Fran’s
tutorials at some point, she wanted him to judge her output on its merits, not
on any preconceived ideas.
“Jon said
you’d had poems published,” she added.
“And I checked out some of your stuff on YouTube.”
“Not the
stand-up. Please tell me you didn’t find
the stand-up.”
“Don’t worry,
I didn’t. Is it that embarrassing?”
“Of course it
is. Me, my guitar and some very dodgy
jokes. A sort of cut-price Billy
Connolly, but without most of the swearing.”
“I liked the
songs, though. They were lovely. A shame they were all covers, though, I
remember you writing your own stuff at uni.”
Fran smiled
rather wickedly. She thought suddenly
how attractive he was, something she’d never noticed all those years ago – but
then he had been a callow boy, and she’d only had eyes for Jon, apparently so
much more adult and confident. “They
weren’t covers,” he said, watching her.
“But they
were! Love You All My Life was a massive hit last year for that boy band,
and didn’t Ellie Goulding do Frozen Heart?”
“She did. But I did it first.”
Belatedly, his
meaning filtered through. “You mean ... you
wrote them?” Stunned, Jenna stared at him, and Fran
grinned back. “Aye, I did.”
“Wow. Triple wowzers, as Rosie would say. That’s amazing! And they’re so good.”
“Don’t sound
too surprised.”
“Well, no, I
didn’t mean to – but I’m seriously impressed, I really am. How did you get into that, then?”
Fran poured
them both another mug of tea. “I used to
do the rounds of the clubs, when I wasn’t doing stand-up. I’d just split with Krystal, I was spending
most of my time on the road, here and in the States, earning a crust of sorts. I did a gig in London, supporting a guy who
was getting a name for himself, and a couple of record companies sent their
people along to listen. One of them
liked my songs and asked if I’d consider writing for an act his label had just
signed.” He grinned. “They weren’t interested in me personally, of
course – too old, for starters, too croaky, no X factor. But I was getting sick of being a nomad by
then, and I thought, why not? So for the
last eight or nine years, that’s what I’ve been doing – writing songs for
anyone who’ll pay me. And I can think of
much worse ways of earning a living.
I’ve been very lucky.”
“Don’t sell
yourself short,” Jenna said warmly. “Luck
doesn’t mean much without talent.”
“Thank
you. It’s given me the freedom to write
poetry, to live the life I want. But
yes, I really am lucky. If that guy
hadn’t been in that club that night ...
I’d still be singing hackneyed folk tunes for fifty quid a night to
boozed-up punters or, if the worst came to the worst, busking on the Tube. Which I’ve done, by the way. Until I was mugged for my takings, and
decided it wasn’t worth the risk.”
“God!” Jenna stared at him in horror. “Were you hurt?”
“Five stitches
here.” He touched the left side of his
jaw, under the beard. “And some more
serious damage to my pride.” He smiled
wryly. “Just before they attacked, they
made a highly slanderous reference to my musical ability. Anyway, it was a long time ago, and I don’t
lose any sleep over it. In fact, life is
pretty good right now, even with Miss Little Princess. In fact, especially
with Miss Little Princess. She’s a good
kid, under all that Californian nonsense, but my gran would have called her a
wee besom.”
“Do you go
back much?”
“To
Inverness? No. My parents died years ago, my sister Kirstie
lives in Bristol and my sister Isabel’s in Birmingham. Both married, kids, boringly conventional.”
“They sound
just like me,” said Jenna. She tried to
make it a light, casual remark, but Fran looked at her quizzically. “Now who’s selling themselves short? I remember what you were like at uni.”
“Yes, I was
Geek Girl. Complete with certificates
in mediaeval Latin and Norman French.”
“Just what
every conventional married woman with two kids needs.”
“It came in
really handy for mopping up babysick.”
Jenna finished the shortbread, which was delicious, and took a mouthful
of tea. “And you still haven’t answered
my question. Why Aldeburgh?”
“I like
it. Not quite as posh as Southwold, more
arty farty. Anyway, it’s temporary. I’ve bought a house near Butley, and it needs
a lot of work, so I’m renting a little place on the High Street. Saying farewell to civilization before moving
to the back of beyond.”
“Butley’s just
down the road from Orford!”
“I know. Strange, where coincidence can take you. If you hadn’t met Jon the other day, you’d
never have known I lived round here. And
then you’d have bumped into me in Aldeburgh one day, and got the shock of your
life.”
“A nice shock,
though. Better than a slap in the face
with a wet fish, as my Nan would have said.”
“She sounds as
if she’d have got on famously with my gran.”
“I expect she
would. Nana May was a one-off, and I
loved her dearly. She died a couple of
months ago.”
Fran looked at
her with sympathy. “I’m sorry to hear
that.”
“Well, she was
ninety-five, so it wasn’t unexpected – but awful, just the same. And she did something rather
surprising.” Jenna took a deep
breath. She hadn’t intended to mention
the casket, but Fran was so easy to talk to, and she found herself telling him
the whole story. He listened attentively,
and then said, “So you’re going to hang on to it? I can’t say I blame you. A promise is a promise.”
“That’s what I
think. I loved Nana May, she was so
good to me at a very difficult time when I was a kid, not much older than Flora
– “
“Which reminds
me, where is Flora?”
They looked at
each other, and then, as one, rose and made for the door. The card shop was just outside the
tea-room. It was empty of all but two
grey-haired women browsing a display of artistic local photographs. Fran went up to the girl behind the
till. “Have you seen a wee lass? Ten years old, hair in plaits?” Under stress, his accent had strengthened.
“Oh, yeah, she
bought a card and went out there.” The
girl pointed to the door that led to the car park behind the main building.
“Jesus, I’ll
murder her,” said Fran, and, ignoring the girl’s look of alarm, ran outside
with Jenna hard at his heels.
There was no
sign of Flora anywhere. Jenna looked
round. The river, with the barge moored
up below the road bridge, was an obvious draw for a child. So was the separate gift shop, in a wood and
brick barn across the car park. But the
river was dangerous, while the shop wasn’t.
She ran across between the cars, narrowly avoiding a VW Golf coming in
rather too fast, and up to the quay. The
barge lay below her, gently tugging on the ropes that moored it fore and aft to
bollards, its deck scrubbed and empty.
She looked wildly up and down the expanse of murky river water flowing
sulkily under the bridge. The tide was
still rising, so if Flora had fallen in...
“Are you
looking for me?” Fran’s daughter ambled
round the corner of the creeper-covered wildlife information centre next to the
quay. She carried a couple of small
bags, and wore a self-satisfied expression.
“I wanted to buy something for Dad.
It’s a surprise.”
“Flora!” Fran came panting up. “What the hell were you thinking of, going
off like that? Next time, you wee besom,
tell us where you’re going before you leg it!”
“Wee besom?”
“Naughty
little girl,” Jenna translated, careful to keep a straight face, though the
relief was overwhelming.
“Sorry,
Dad,” said Flora, meekly and with every appearance of sincerity. Jenna caught the sparkle of mischief in her
lowered eyes, and knew that the child had every expectation of being able to
wind her father round her little finger.
“Well, don’t
do it again, OK? The river’s dangerous,
and you never know what nutters might be around.”
“I
won’t.” Flora held out one of the
bags. “I was buying a present for you,
Dad.”
“Oh,
God.” Fran stared at her rather
helplessly, and then started to laugh.
“You and I are going to have a long and serious talk, young lady, when I
get you home.”
Jenna judged
that this would be a good moment to say her farewells. “It was really nice to see you again. And to meet Flora.”
“Not so sure
that was such a pleasure,” said Fran, but there was a definite twinkle in his
eyes. “Anyway, let’s not leave it
another twenty-five years, OK? And good
luck with your casket – let me know how that goes.”
“I will,”
Jenna promised. They hugged, kissed, and
then she watched him walk away towards his car, Flora firmly held by the
hand. As they reached a blue hatchback,
the child turned and gave a cheeky wave, and before she could stop herself,
Jenna waved in reply. Then she
remembered that she’d left her bags of jams and chutneys in the tea-room, and
went back inside, hoping that they hadn’t been nicked, or, worse, assumed to be
a suspicious parcel and ordered to be blown up by the bomb squad.
Of course,
neither had happened, and she sat down, finished her tea, by now rather cold,
and thought about the meeting. It was
nice to discover that twenty five years had made no difference to their
friendship, and she looked forward to seeing him again, with or without the
redoubtable Flora. And if he was buying
a house near Butley, there’d be no reason not to. She must email Jules and tell her that, quite
unexpectedly, she’d met up with both Jon and Fran, and wondered what her
forthright sister-in-law would say to that.
Meanwhile, she
must go home, sort out something for her evening meal, and try to carry on with
her research. Maybe something had
escaped her this morning, and the right Emily Taylor would suddenly pop up on
her laptop screen, waving enthusiastically and saying, “You see, I was here all
along, right under your nose!”
If only, Jenna thought, making her way
outside to the car with her purchases. But she’s out there somewhere. All I have to do is find her. Apart from anything else, I want to report some
positive progress when I see Emma on Thursday.
She couldn’t help
feeling, though, that it was a case of ‘easier said than done’, and that tracing
her female ancestors would be a long, frustrating and difficult task. I hope you
appreciate it, Nana May, she told her grandmother silently, as she got into
her car. I’m going to a lot of trouble on your behalf, to
keep my promises, and I just hope I succeed.
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